Wishes; Granted, just not how you thought.

Growing up, you always make wishes in which there is no earthly possibility that they be granted. When your younger, creativity flows heavy like river and as you grow it slowly becomes a creek. Like creeks grow when there is rain fall, our creativity grow by influences. When I was younger I always wished I could have super powers and wings. I was always a curious kid, going on adventures and finding new hang out spots within our neighborhood. Whether they were just the shed in my backyard or a neighbors bush, my imagination would make that old broken down shed into an abandoned mansion and those bushes into jungles below the equator. With that said I always tried being cunning and sly but my mother and neighbors always knew exactly where I was. Due to always being found, I always wished I had the power to change. Change into other people, animals, even household items. Many times my mother would be asking, "What are you today?" To which my response would always be along the line of, "I am a frog, mom. Can you not see I'm hopping around, trying to catch bugs." or "Mom. I can't talk, I'm a lamp." This method never helped when playing Hide and Seek for obvious reasons. Having the power to change would have really helped then. Along with Hide and Seek, I would love playing Tag. What I hated though, was being it. I hated chasing my friends because I would get tired, I appreciated running from them a lot more. It would be then when I would wish I had wings. When I would see pictures of angels or gargoyles, I would imagine having a set of my own wings. I would imagine flying all over the world, making new discoveries at every stop I would make. I would run around with my arms extended as though they were the wings of airplanes. I would do this specially when I was chasing my friends during a game of Tag. It made me feel like it would make me go faster. When I imagined my wings, I saw them coming out of my back. They would be twice as long as my arms and as wide as half of my height. Looking back now, in a way I still have these wishes. I wish I could change, not to sneak around, but to make a change. Change myself, not physically but intellectually for the better. I wish I had wings, not so I could be faster and tag my friends, but to travel and feel the freedom of free falling yet being able to rely on my wings to keep me from a lethal crash against the earth's crust. Thinking deeper into it, I'm somewhat fulfilling my childhood wishes. I try to learn every single day, which means I have changed from the person I was yesterday to the person I am today. My wings are my education. Like wings, my education can take me many places, literally and figuratively. I can always rely on my education to keep me from crashing to a certain extent. I guess wishes come true.

Love note.

There are not enough words in this world to perfectly dictate my love to you. A whirlwind of butterflies, home baked cookies, and puppy smiles is what comes to mind each time I think of you. Looking back, I don't know how I managed to go a day without knowing you. I mean I knew of you and some of your background. You were someone I always knew existed but not in the way that I know now. Your drive, independence, and fearlessness inspires me. Your optimism sticks to me like the annoying weeds that stick to your socks when you go out for a walk in a field. In the moment of feeling your touch, even if it is a simple graze, my skin becomes sensitive. It is like all the textures in the world are all touching me in the very spot you lightly caressed. The beat to an accelerated dance song is the beat to which my heart beats the moment I see you. I still remember the first time I said a simple hello to you and my eyes finally saw the true beauty behind that beautiful face. Your physical beauty is no comparison to your inner beauty. Physically you are gorgeous. As if you were sculpted by the great sculptors of the past. As if you belonged in some art gallery dedicated to the perfect female specimen. Inside though, you find kindness, joy, and love. Staring into your eyes is like staring at the stars. Beautiful to the eye but with so much depth and magic. Fireworks, canons going off, or even an atomic bomb are nothing in comparison to the feelings experienced when our lips meet. The way you so swiftly lay back and relax on our way home from a day filled of laughter and fun gets me every time. The fear of losing you overcomes me at just the thought of it. You make me feel things I have never experienced with anyone else. Jealousy, anger, and rage; feelings I get just at the thought of you leaving. I am not one to hold you back though. We each are free spirits put on this earth to roam the lands in search of what we define as happiness. What I do want is to walk along your side. To be there when you need to be picked up. To be there when you need a laugh. To help you out figuring whether to go left or right. We each walk a path, this path is what we call life. We each have our own path and sometimes by taking a sudden right we end up meeting with other peoples paths. Some peoples paths end up slowly drifting until each have gone in different directions. Others happiness may not be your happiness and that's ok. Eventually we find someone who's happiness is in the same direction. I am no future teller but to me, your the one I will walk alongside meet our happiness. I love you. Three words, so much more behind them. That's the power of words and there is not enough words to express the power your love gives me. Thank you and I love you.

Don't judge a book by its cover and learn

I am a walking sponge. Not like the cartoon character Spongebob, but a sponge. I am the type of person who gets influenced a lot by the people I am around. Through high school I always hung around the "weird" kids. The kids that weren't the most popular. I found out that these kids were the most accepting though. I didn't have to wear brand name clothing or have money in order to connect with them. I guess I was a weird kid myself. At our school, the classic stereotypes were huge. These were specially visible on the earlier years of high school. I never really felt like o fit in any clan really. Being Hispanic, I was expected to hang out with the other Hispanic students but I never had a connection. My interests were not the same as theirs. I wasn't super studious so that left me out of the nerds. I wasn't athletic so I wasn't a jock. I was never mean enough to be a bully. I didn't do drugs or drink, so that left out the partiers. I did school clubs and some sports such as key club, STUCCO, choir, tennis, soccer and multicultural club. I always felt like I had too much to offer to just stick to one clan so I tended to navigate between all of the clans. By my senior year, I literally talked to everyone. I've always enjoyed listening to others and helping them with their issues so I think that helped me connect with so many people. Out of all the people I spoke to, I always seemed to attain some characteristic from them. From the Hispanics I learned to be proud of me heritage. From the choir kids I learned to work in a team. From the popular kids I learned some social skills. From the artistic kids I learned creativity. With all that I had attained I managed to reach people in ways others couldn't. We all are multifaceted. There's more to us than what we let others see. I learned a lot about people that they usually wouldn't let anyone else know. I loved it. I still love that. With or without them knowing, I always took lessons from them. My social skills now lack a bit due to the lack of interaction with others but when I try I tend to get further than the usual weather talk. There's valuable lessons to learn from everyone. Don't judge a book by its cover, for in the end you'll be the one who is surprised and end up leaving with more than when you arrived. I'm a sponge because I learn from others and learn to appreciate new things. An open mind can lead you to greatness.

Age is but a number.

Being a teen, you always look up to the day when your finally 18.  That magical number that makes it seem like you are now an adult. You are free to do anything you want, except drink. You know many other countries legal drinking age is 18. Just wanted to share a fact. As you grow past 18 you look forward to when your finally 21 and can be free to go anywhere without restriction. After 21 there really isn't any age that seems like a milestone. At 21 is when you finally realize "Holy crap, I'm an adult. What do I do now?!" At least that's what happened to me. All through high school I always tended to look younger than the rest of my classmates so I was never surprised when teachers and students who didn't know me thought I was a sophomore when in reality I was a senior. Back then it was so annoying. It was annoying when I would go to the gas station and try to purchase lotto tickets and I'd be asked for my ID. It would be even more annoying when I would be asked of it was a fake. At 21 I was always asked for my ID when purchasing alcohol. Even when I was a regular. After some time they stopped asking for my ID and I started to miss it. I would wonder if I looked older than I was now. I mean the peach fuzz on my face finally looks like facial hair but other than that I look the same. After going so long without being asked for an ID, anytime I was, I would get so excited because right then my fear of looking older was demolished. I consider my young looks a blessing now. I mean Hollywood actors and actresses spend millions to look younger. Hopefully that won't be an investment I'll have to make anytime soon. Today I went to my girlfriend's middle school aged sisters basketball game and was able to pass of for a high school student. A 22 year old passing off as a high school student. She must of thought I was a senior or something. Either way it felt kinda good that even to a teacher I could still pass off as a student. I mean I am a student just not a high school student. I'll use to my advantage while I can. No that doesn't mean dating underage high school girls. That's just sick.

Expect the unexpected.

Life works in curious ways. For 18 years of my life I have always only had one beautiful sister. We have only known each other for her whole life and can easily say we are not only siblings but best of friends. We get along for the majority of the time, but like all siblings we have our moments. I have always tried to do better in life, not only for myself but to be a great role model for my sister. I have always tried to instill independence and self-worth into her. I have always cheered her on and have, and WILL be there for her no matter what. She is my confidant and pillar. At her young age, she has been there for me far more than what she knows. Honestly, if she would have never been in my life, I know my life today would be drastically different. Through the years growing up, we, more her than I, have wanted more siblings. I always wanted an older sibling to guide me and teach me, we all know that's not possible though. This past Christmas of 2013, we were all positively surprised. It was Christmas eve morning and all seemed normal. The usual traditions of Christmas eve for our family is to sleep in, have brunch and then later go to my maternal grandmothers house for dinner and family gift exchange. Everything was going as normal. Everyone waking up around 11 in the morning. Brunch was ready and we were all eating. My mother had been feeling different for a few days. To take herself out suspicions, she decided to take a pregnancy test. She wasn't very optimistic, as my parents had been trying to have more kids for a very long time. Probably since the time my sister was about 5 years old and crying because all the other kids were getting little siblings but her. My mom hadn't told any of us of her suspicions as she didn't want to get us excited only to let us down. All of a sudden while eating some tasty chorizo and eggs, my sister and I heard our mom scream. We quickly run to the bathroom to check on her. She instantly shuts us out and tells us that it was nothing. She then sends me on some errands for the Christmas dinner later in the evening. During my absence my mother calls for my sister and excitedly shows her the positive pregnancy test. To make sure of it's accuracy my mom sent my sister for a "better" test on one of Walmart's busiest mornings. My sister told me she was so embarrassed as she felt everyone's eyes follow her in judgement. She felt as if everyone all of a sudden saw her as a disappointment for being in suspicion of being pregnant at such a young age. If they only knew that the tests were actually for our 40 year old mother. When I had returned from my errands my sister pulls aside and states, "Hey! Can you keep a HUGE secret?"
I instantly got mixed emotions, "My mom told me not to tell you anything BUT we may have a new sibling!!!"
Instantly the worries turned to joy, excitement and concern. I was joyous and excited for we would finally have a baby in the house! My concerns came due to my mothers age and how pregnancy is a lot more risky in more mature years. I was also concerned about being a great role model. I was concerned about it being a boy. After all I only had experience being a sibling to a girl. I was concerned about being enough of a man to be a representation of what he needed to be when he grew up.
After my sister had finally spilled the beans, behind my mothers back, my mom called me dad over to let him know of the news. They were very bad about not making it obvious. My mom, thinking I had no idea, kept getting onto my dad for letting out too much information. I kept quiet as a form of respect to my mothers wishes. The next morning I couldn't hold it in and I let my mom know that I knew it all.
Through the pregnancy each one of us were very hands on. We did our best to comfort mom and baby. We even got sent to a high risk doctor but all came well. 9 months later Sarai, pronounced almost like sun ray, arrived.

22 years of age and I already feel way older than these younger generations. Growing up, social networks were for college kids and high school. Myspace was the big thing then. If you were a middle schooler and had a Myspace, it was more than likely that you lied on your age, and were kind of considered a loser. Until high school came along. If you weren't on Myspace changing you profile lay out every week or changing the song that automatically played to some hip rap song, you weren't an American teenager. Back then it was only that and Instant Messenger. Now you go online and go to any website and it ends up being some type of social network. That's great that we are all connected, but some people "over-connect" and take their social pages way to seriously. I am not saying I am not guilty of having multiple social pages but when your posting videos and provocative pictures just to get likes I think it is time to start doing some outdoor activities. There is not a day I go on any social media platform in which I don't see some kid posting: "Get this status to 50 likes and I'll put my hand on fire" or "Do it for the [insert favorite social media]" Come on people...

Where you like Diana Ross and The Supremes?

Isn't everything provocative now a days? According to my grandmother it is much more than what it was in her times. As she explains to me what it was like to date back in the 60s I imagine my grandmother young, walking through the dirt roads of her Mexican hometown. Picturing the fabulous, yet conservative, fashions of not only the young women but men. Keep in mind, where we originate from, it seems like they are about 20 years behind. Until recently that is. During my grandmother's younger years, and even my mothers, our little Mexican village had no running water in homes, or electricity. People lived in very poor conditions in comparison to, let's say the US. That didn't keep the hip youngsters from being rebellious of course. My grandmother tells me of all the dances she would attend and how even though she would be dating a young fellow, she'd have to dance with any boys that asked her to dance to the music playing through her future brother-in-laws phonograph. If she were to be "dating" a guy, they didn't actually ever go on dates. Instead they would let each other know their schedules and walk to school together or meet up along the way to get water. If her mother ever caught her talking to boys she would get in so much trouble, her brothers would have to accompany her on any errands. As strict as that all sounds, to my belief, it worked for the best. When you look at older couple's most have been together for the majority of their life. Now, your lucky to here of anyone still being married to their first partner for longer than 5 years. I'm not judging, or will I ever judge anyone who has gone through a divorce.  Not all things are fixable or forgivable. I'm just saying that older generations seem to stay together longer than their kids have.